September 7, 2011

Today is Wednesday 9/7/11 and this update is a little different then all the updates I have done to date.  I have always blogged about things that have already happened, doctor visits, hospital stays or other cancer shenanigans.  Today I have decided to write about something that has yet to happen. 

Tomorrow is my 35th birthday.  

There have been several times in my life when I have reflected on where I am and the pride that comes along with the accomplishments or adventures I was brave enough to endure.  The best things in my life have happened when I took risks / chances.  The challenge of “Kicking Cancers’ Butt” has been no different.  

I felt nervous when I left home to go to college, I felt nervous when I started my career, I felt nervous when I started riding mountain, I felt nervous when I started racing, I felt nervous when I learned to ride a motorcycle and I felt nervous when I set out to Kick Cancers’ Butt.  Matt and I saw a very powerful movie a few months back called “127 hours”.  This movie is about a mountain climber who gets trapped under a boulder while out climbing alone near Moab, Utah.  During the course of being trapped he has to cut off his own arm to survive.  In this movie the young man comes to terms with the fact that he was destined to be in this exact place at this exact time and I feel the same way.  As I look back on the risks I have taken in my life and the adventures I have experienced I realize that I was meant to be here right now.  And it is through this realization that I am able to learn the most that cancer has to teach me.  I know I didn’t have to cut off my own arm, but this experience has been full of challenges.  I feel that the first 34 years of my life prepared me for the moment that I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer.  I once read that a person can have cancer for 10 years before they are diagnosed, if I think back on my life for the last 10 years I really think it wasn’t until I was 34 that I was ready to attack this disease with such enthusiasm.    

I understand that many cancer patients can have a cancer recurrence.  I also understand that the treatment I have chosen (chemo and radiation) have long term effects and I am highly likely to experience those as well (heart issues or pulmonary issues).  All of that being said I would not trade the life lessons behind this diagnosis for anything.  I am very proud to be where I am today.  Cancer survivorship isn’t something I dangle in front of others or the only identifying factor I have these days ... but cancer has absolutely changed who I am and how I see the world.  No matter what, for the rest of my life I will always be proud of the path I have walked and incredibly grateful for the opportunity to learn from and be with those who have walked the path with me.  My absolutely amazing husband, who shows me everyday how much he loves me.  My loving family, who have no choice but to love me.  My supportive friends (new and old), who have proven to me that the adventures in our lives bring us closer.  

While I can remember many fantastic birthdays in my life, filled with family and friends ... I can guarantee that tomorrow will be one of the happiest birthdays I have ever had!!  Mostly because the gift of wisdom gained through illness is like no other.  

As a reminder:  Don’t forget that the way we celebrate birthdays in our family (Matt and I) is by way of weekends ... so my birthday lasts from Thursday through at least Monday - so please feel free to send me an email or post a comment to the blog with your birthday wishes :)

Hugs and kisses to each and every one of you!!

Stay tuned for more SuperMonkey Adventures,

Nancy

AKA:  SuperMonkey

“And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count.  It’s the life in your years.”

 - Abraham Lincoln

“Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.”

 - Mark Twain